To Catch a Yeti

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• Canada • 1995 • 95m •

• Directed by: Bob Keen. • Starring: Meat Loaf, Chantellese Kent, Richard Howland, Jim Gordon, Leigh Lewis, Jeff Moser, Michael Panton, Mona Matteo, Ria Franchuk, Reginald Doresa, Andreas M. Haralampides, David Walberg, Rob Rutter. • Music by: Brent Barkman, Carl Lenox, Jack Lenz.

Hunter Big Jake finds the fabled Himalayan Yeti -- the Big Foot of legend. But what he really finds is a cuddly, furry animal the size of a large teddy bear -- with enormous feet! And when Jake brings the Yeti to New York it becomes the pet of a spoiled son of a multi-millionaire. Only a little girl named Amy can set the poor Yeti free.

Review:

Ever look at a ratty stuffed toy and wish that its eyes moved around a little and its mouth sort of opened and closed? Well, have I got the movie event you've been waiting for! For the rest of us unfortunate enough to watch this piece of poo, you'll want to kill yourself just like the police in the small town will apparently do if you told them someone stole your yeti! Yes, the makers of this film thought lets make a film about a crummy looking stuffed toy and have the most horrifically obnoxious characters ever interact with it and for reasons that still baffle me, they thought Meatloaf was some sort of real super strong badass who could portray a hunter...

The story, Big Jake and his traveling companion fatboy or lard guy or something along those lines are in Nepal searching for a yeti that is not at all like you would expect as it is not large, but rather looks like a scraggly piece of rodent roadkill. It eludes capture by hiding in a bag of a person camping and he somehow does not notice it as he packs his bags and heads home where his daughter unnaturally leaves a piece of pumpkin pie outside the bathroom door for her father and this seemingly unnatural act is the first of many as when the creature is discovered the girl proudly says that she found its penis, thus, she knows its a boy! Meanwhile, Big Jake keeps tracking it and never breaks out in song while we see the most obnoxious portrayal of a kid ever! The only way I made it through this drek is that it is featured on Rifftrax and even then the jokes made at the movies expense could not make this film so bad its good...

The only 'actor' of note is musician Meatloaf who was kind of trying to do acting during this time. The makers of this film apparently thought he was a tough guy, but I remember him most for singing a song and getting axed by Dr. Frankenfurter from Rocky Horror! I have never pictured him as anything but a dude who would most likely grow tired and pass out after a few seconds in a fight. The yeti looks horrible, some other reviewer thought that thing was cute, but I have seen decomposing animals on the side of the road that looked more alive and less ratty than the thing in this film. Also, it apparently starts to die when it overheats, so shouldn't it have died like when it was in the dude's bag for like the longest time ever?

So if you wish to torture yourself and watch a ratty toy go on an adventure, this is the film for you! For everyone else, I implore you to never lay your eyes upon this most foulest of crap! It is an excruciating film to watch as you watch people act unnaturally as people who have sons that purposely electrocute maids do not buy them a yeti, they send them to military school or therapy!

Review by Aaron1375 from the Internet Movie Database.

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