Alien Uprising |
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USA • 2008 • 85m •
  • Directed by: Andrew Bellware. • Starring: Rebecca Kush, Steve Deighan, Amelia Randolph Campbell, Jeffrey Plunkett, Ivory Aquino, James Edward Becton, Daniel Blatman, Angela Funk, Jang Don Kim, Kumiko Konishi, Zach Lombardo, Montserrat Mendez, Thomas Rowen..    A unit of space marines is sent from Earth to a distant prison planet with which all contact has been lost. Upon waking from suspended animation, its members learn that their number includes a civilian, an employee of the company that runs the prison. After landing, they get involved in a shootout with some armed prisons and both sides suffer casualties. However, the marines learn that there was no uprising and that for the past three years the prison has been stalked by an invulnerable monster created by the company's biological experiments on the prisoners. The latter now have no option but to cooperate with the military in a desperate attempt to escape the planet...
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Review:
The "LT" is laughable as the "strong female warrior" and the fact that they had to throw in the side note that she's lesbian with one of the soldiers in her squad made my eyes roll so hard. And there's a scene where she tells a soldier, who is using a motion tracker, to watch for more "unfriendliness" rather than "unfriendlies". And the way the soldiers kept calling her "LT" just induced more giggles. Another laugh-inducing element was the way some of the Mary-eens delivered the line "I'm a marine", it just came across like a bunch of kids playing soldier in the backyard and trying to convince their daddy how tough they are.
There's a scene where one of these very soft and pretty Mary-eens is asked by a prisoner how many people she's killed and the delivery of her answer had me rolling with laughter. I'd be more likely to believe that she's picked 100 daisies in a meadow surrounded by unicorns and cute little Disney cartoon animals before I ever accepted the story that she's killed 100 people.
The set looks like they dressed up a basement and built one hallway and shot every scene of them running down the same hall over and over again. Some of the weapons don't make any sense or are left unexplained as to how they work and why. The ship's A.I. is annoying as hell. The soundtrack is crap. The visual effects are visual crap.
This movie's version of the "Alien" is just a guy in a sweat suit wearing a psuedo-xeonmorph mask. Granted the filmmakers did figure out a clever way around having to build an actual alien suit by having the "alien" be a human prisoner who happened to get mutated into the creature, hence the jogging suit.
Review by J_Brian from the Internet Movie Database.
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